it's the estrogen... ALL THE ESTROGEN

The past couple of days have literally been a raging storm of emotions. Not just a tidal wave of them but like a tsunami and hurricane and flood and tornado of bad juju (I love the word juju so don't judge me). I'm not saying this to make me sound like the lonely college kid that's way out of her element being around a bunch of sorority girls... I'm just saying this to make the point that being a girl sucks.

My second night here I was just settling down to the idea of being away from authority figures and not having people come at my every beckon call. I came in at about 2ish... not partying. I was watching Napoleon Dynamite with the CCSC because I, Hailey Lachowsy, am a rebel.... and I was naturally the only one awake in the suite I share with 3 other girls. The toilet had been acting weird so I just flushed it to see what it would do, armed with a plunger and my fiercest plumbing face. Water literally came rolling out of there so fast it flooded the bathroom floor in seconds. It was like Noah's Ark in there... like I was about to go get tools to build a makeshift boat. But I'm not the person to have around in those situations, so I simply put the plunger down, and walked away. I'm the best roommate EVER. Ain't nobody got time for that. And I'm not trying to sound like a person stuck in the antiquated notion of the male ideal... but that's what dads are for.

Classes also started this morning so OF COURSE my roommates woke me up at 6 by slamming every cabinet door and jamming to every pop song possible to start my morning off in a bad way. I go to the building and room that my schedule says... and 10 minutes in, the professor isn't there and there are only like 5 other people in there. APPARENTLY I was not informed of the room change so I showed up late to my first class AND had to sit in the front row. My 3rd class for the day ALSO said the wrong time and day. Just my luck, I know.

The whole time I was sitting there with excruciating cramps. Not that y'all care, but anyone that's ever had to experience this can sympathize with me and agree that you give it whatever it wants. If you're craving ice cream.. it gets ice cream. If you're craving chinese food with peanut butter and pickles and cocoa puffs.. then that's what you eat. Just like that freaky old childhood story Rumpelstiltskin, I would literally give my cramps my first born child if it would lighten the pain. Which is kind of paradoxical, I realize that. But you get the point. It sounds insensitive but I'm just bein' brutally honest. And to tie the title to the story, I'm positive that all the estrogen in me somehow caused these unfortunate things to happen. Not quite sure how, but I know it did.

Okay I'm done giving out way personal information that no one wants to read about.

that is all

series of unfortunate collegiate events

So.... I finally succumbed to the personal pressure of getting a blog. I've been toying with the idea for a while, but my college life has been nothing short of the books series of unfortunate events that used to be super popular. I've always been awkward and unlucky. But these past couple days have just truly shown me how much of an awkward person I am.

Move in day sucked. Plain as that. Even though I was one of those prissy, fortunate girls that didn't have to carry anything up to my room (partly because I'm on the 5th floor so I would've died on the way up from pure exhaustion). I got there and my room was great & I had WAY more closet space than I expected. But my motto in life is "if your clothes fit in your closet & suitcase... you simply didn't bring enough clothes". My roommate wasn't there yet & I was feeling very apprehensive because we'd never met. All I knew is that her name was Teona and she was an albino African-American girl. Awesome, I know. And YES it is possible.

She was moving her stuff in and just headed out the door to go back downstairs and I was like "I'll just change shirts really fast". My logic failed me on that part because just as I took off my shirt her BROTHER walked in..... and quickly turned around and politely acted like he hadn't just seen me completely half naked. Needless to say I got really close to her family very fast. I learned later that she's like Charlie Chaplin in those silent films... she just doesn't talk.

That night I went to bed around 2 and was drained- physically & emotionally. I've never been away from home for more than 5 nights... so trying to grasp the concept of the fact that this is my new home... away from the one I've lived in for 18 years.... was freaking weird (for lack of better words). Then at about 3 that night we got woken up by this incessant banging on our wall which can only be described as what sounded like a headboard. Teona said she heard them, but thank goodness I was spared of that. So cliché for a state university, but yes. I'm 95% sure we got woken up by- how do I put this eloquently- ummm, a classy couple fornicating. ON THE FIRST NIGHT. they got busy fast. Sorry, I'm done putting that picture in your mind, I just wanted you to get a glimpse of my unlucky, slightly uninteresting life.